Could be oddity, maybe lack of communication. When answers need to be found it is not a bad thing to be a solitary fellow. A young woman once told me that my position in this world is the same as philosophers and artists because just like them I am able to create concepts and consequently put some order into chaos.
I really don’t know if I was worthy of that comparison but I have to admit that I enjoyed being set side by side with practitioners that I have always envied a little. Perhaps our similarities are more like the tremors of an earthquake rather than just whimsical taxonomies. Let me illustrate this point: artists, philosophers and scientists will form an alliance and we will sell our lonesome concepts to get generous payments. With the money I will invite that young woman to travel wherever she pleases. We will spend our days promenading, learning from the local cultures, having dinner at fancy restaurants. Then, in the perfect dreamy location, I will finally be vulnerable enough to tell her that I am also a prophet and that my laboratory is the place where I put my conjurations to the test.
I really don’t know if I was worthy of that comparison but I have to admit that I enjoyed being set side by side with practitioners that I have always envied a little. Perhaps our similarities are more like the tremors of an earthquake rather than just whimsical taxonomies. Let me illustrate this point: artists, philosophers and scientists will form an alliance and we will sell our lonesome concepts to get generous payments. With the money I will invite that young woman to travel wherever she pleases. We will spend our days promenading, learning from the local cultures, having dinner at fancy restaurants. Then, in the perfect dreamy location, I will finally be vulnerable enough to tell her that I am also a prophet and that my laboratory is the place where I put my conjurations to the test.
It’s a bit of an embarrassment to talk like this, embedded in these surrealist landscapes, scenes of heresy and epistemological confusion, but I do it because I recently realized that I am a traitor by nature and to jump into another boat is not a problem for me. I talk as a traitor, I act as a traitor and I don’t find it problematic to be a walking contradiction, just see old Galileo. I will betray society’s geocentrism by saying what fools don’t want to hear, I will betray my peers by talking shit about our guild, I will betray the human race by accepting money from the most heinous sources, and I will probably betray myself on the day in which I will hang my robe, get a boat and embark on a sailing adventure across some islands at the end of the world.
The immensity of nature will be my shelter, I will feed the fish and befriend the local witch. My years of meditation are going to be the best training for a new life of intrigues and empirical discoveries of a totally different kind. Treason will become ubiquitous and yes, oddity will still be there.
The immensity of nature will be my shelter, I will feed the fish and befriend the local witch. My years of meditation are going to be the best training for a new life of intrigues and empirical discoveries of a totally different kind. Treason will become ubiquitous and yes, oddity will still be there.
Shhh! Come with me quietly, respectfully. Let's not disturb the rainforest. Yes, that's much better, thank you. Now don't say a word, just take a look around you. There are macaws crossing the jungle sky in a thunderstorm of colours. There are the eyes of a jaguar, shining bright under the moonlight, brighter than the most precious gemstone you can take from the entrails of the earth. There are capuchin monkeys howling with laughter, telling silly jokes to each other, communing across their trees in their strange language. Oh, be careful when you are near the water. The piranhas may come to you, attracted by the youthful smell of your flesh. Oh, joy, how the jungle beams with life tonight!
I am the Amazon rainforest, the Lungs of the Planet, home to a plethora of species of animals and plants alike, nowhere to be found in any other place in the world. Fuller than Noah's Ark, richer than the treasures of any king or queen on Earth.
I am the Amazon rainforest, the Lungs of the Planet, home to a plethora of species of animals and plants alike, nowhere to be found in any other place in the world. Fuller than Noah's Ark, richer than the treasures of any king or queen on Earth.
The trees have built mazes across my lands like the most intricate cities of human beings. My temples are made of trunks, leaves, pouring rain. Take a wrong turn and you might be lost forever, for this is not a place for the uninitiated and guileless. You have to forge your own path, but the forest will give you its hands if you let it do so. Now go in the right direction, follow the path your instinct tells you to follow, and in no time you will be surprised by visions of beauty unsurpassed.
Life has sustained itself here in a balance that has lasted for centuries. But... wait, what is that? Can you see those black fumes rising in the background? Can you hear the roar of a thousand engines, razing the jungle in the name of who knows what? When a thousand fires rage across the forest, the jaguars shed tears in silence. When a thousand bulldozers clear the lands, the monkeys shut their laughter away, and mourn their departed in silence. Plantations, cattle ranches, factories growing all over. Hunters, loggers, farm equipment everywhere. What will become of the sanctuary now? Can our old paradise be saved from destruction?
Life has sustained itself here in a balance that has lasted for centuries. But... wait, what is that? Can you see those black fumes rising in the background? Can you hear the roar of a thousand engines, razing the jungle in the name of who knows what? When a thousand fires rage across the forest, the jaguars shed tears in silence. When a thousand bulldozers clear the lands, the monkeys shut their laughter away, and mourn their departed in silence. Plantations, cattle ranches, factories growing all over. Hunters, loggers, farm equipment everywhere. What will become of the sanctuary now? Can our old paradise be saved from destruction?
Ever since I was very young I wanted to be recognised, I wanted to be admired, I wanted to be desired. I wanted to be successful, I wanted to be powerful; success and power make other people love you. Love did I say? No, no. I take that back. Love is not the right word; what I longed for was devotion, adoration. I wanted to be someone whom others would treat with respect; someone whom others would look up to. I wanted to feel like a god. I wanted people to fall silent when I walked by, to look at me with starry eyes and fall silent, in complete awe, I wanted them to feel humble at my commanding presence. I thought it was the only way I could fill the Void, the darkest hunger that was slowly eating me from the inside.
Early on I learned to play the game. Ambition was good. Money was good. Greed was good. Weakness was bad; nobody likes a wimp. I had to reforge myself in steel. Highs felt amazing. Lows felt horrible but I learned how to avoid them, or so I thought. Yet what happened? Somehow I lost myself. I wore the most expensive suits on the market, I fucked the most beautiful women men can imagine.
Early on I learned to play the game. Ambition was good. Money was good. Greed was good. Weakness was bad; nobody likes a wimp. I had to reforge myself in steel. Highs felt amazing. Lows felt horrible but I learned how to avoid them, or so I thought. Yet what happened? Somehow I lost myself. I wore the most expensive suits on the market, I fucked the most beautiful women men can imagine.
I have seen every sea from the top of my yacht. What for? What did I win? What did I lose? I cannot say. Some say life is a wheel, but for me it is more like a whirlwind. It is too late now to get out of it, you just have to keep spinning, spinning, spinning. I wanted admiration, but I got only adulation. I became a statue to which everyone would pretend to pray, yet everyone was waiting to topple at the first chance.
I have not filled the Void yet; it still consumes me like the first day. Shine bright like a star and you will become one, I thought. But it is cold, dark and lonely in space; I should have known that. I live in hiding from myself but when by sheer chance I find myself I see that I am more miserable than when it all began. But it feels good to wipe your tears with 100 dollar bills I suppose. My world is going down now; I'm taking it down with me. Down into the Void I was never able to escape.
